Advice columnist Ann Landers once gave some helpful
advice regarding the work marriage involves. One of her
readers lamented the unrealistic ideas many girls had of
marriage, beseeching, “Why don’t you level with them,
Ann?” Landers replied:
I have leveled with the girls–from Anchorage to

I tell them that all marriages are happy.
It’s the living together afterward that’s tough. I tell them that a good marriage is not a gift,
It’s an achievement.
That marriage is not for kids. It takes guts and
It separates the men from the boys and the women
from the girls.
I tell them that marriage is tested daily by the
ability to compromise.
Its survival can depend on being smart enough to
know what’s worth fighting about. Or making an
issue of or even mentioning.
Marriage is giving–and more important, it’s
And it is almost always the wife who must do these
Then, as if that were not enough, she must be
willing to forget what she forgave.
Often that is the hardest part.
Oh, I have leveled all right. If they don’t get my
message, Buster,
It’s because they don’t want to get it.
Rose-colored glasses are never made in bifocals
Because nobody wants to read the small print in
Ann Landers.

“A Woman’s
Question” by Lena Lathrop, speaks particularly to men.

Do you know you have asked for the costliest thing
Ever made by the Hand above?
A woman’s heart, and a woman’s life–
And a woman’s wonderful love.
Do you know you have asked for this priceless thing. As a child might ask for a toy?
Demanding what others have died to win,
With the reckless dash of a boy.
You have written my lesson of duty out,
Manlike, you have questioned me.
Now stand at the bars of my woman’s soul
Until I shall question thee.
You require your mutton shall always be hot,
Your socks and your shirt be whole;
I require your heart be true as God’s stars
And as pure as His heaven your soul.
You require a cook for your mutton and beef,
I require a far greater thing;
A seamstress you’re wanting for socks and shirts–
I look for a man and a king.
A king for the beautiful realm called Home,
And a man that his Maker, God,
Shall look upon as He did on the first
And say: “It is very good.”
I am fair and young, but the rose may fade
From this soft young cheek one day;
Will you love me then ‘mid the falling leaves,
As you did ‘mong the blossoms of May?
Is your heart an ocean so strong and true,
I may launch my all on its tide?
A loving woman finds heaven or hell
On the day she is made a bride. I require all things that are grand and true,
All things that a man should be;
If you give this all, I would stake my life
To be all you demand of me.
If you cannot be this, a laundress and cook
You can hire and little to pay;
But a woman’s heart and a woman’s life
Are not to be won that way.

I have gotten these from a novel I read some time, just can’t remember the title. But this is a reminder to a friend who might not see it , but even at twenty, desires a bed of roses without thorns , in marriage.